May we present to you...madam pessimist. Always has a negative comment, negative outlook on life and low self-esteem. The kind of person you don't want in your friendship circle or sadly as a co-worker.
To get your very own Fun-mouth bucket all you need is to do is, be a married man, scouting for a single Peter puffing hose beast walking the streets! This may cost you several drinks, a possible trip to the free clinic and full tank of gas. Pssshhh, mere coins as long as the wife doesn't find out!